How to Hire A Vampire Consultant by Hollis Shiloh

Author:Hollis Shiloh [Shiloh, Hollis]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: gay romance, vampire, humor, paranormal, reluctant hero, enemies to lovers, antihero
Publisher: Spare Words Press
Published: 2019-04-15T23:00:00+00:00

AS WE WERE SEARCHING the shelves and catalogues, I made my way to work beside Barnaby.

Beatrice was searching much more intently and competently than we were, but I still waited till I was sure she was too distracted and far away to notice any chatting from us.

"How'd you know all that stuff?" I said in a low voice.

He looked at me quickly, slightly guiltily. "What?"

"You heard me. All that stuff about this creature and old colleges breaking up. It's not in Beatrice's library, so how do you know it?"

"Ancient vampire wisdom," said Barnaby, drawing himself up with as much dignity as he could manage—which wasn't much, considering how nervous he looked.

"Uh huh."

"It's true. I have all sorts of dark secrets and arcane knowledge. I am a vampire, you know."

"You? You're a goth twink theatre kid playing dress-up. I'm not saying you don't suck blood, and obviously the sun burns you, but you're not some eldritch horror. In fact, I bet you don't know any more than I do, Barnaby."

He drew himself up to his full height, opened his mouth to tell me off, and instead, looking horrified, he squeaked, "Barnaby? How—"

Sue me, it was a funny name. Should I call him Barney for short? "You're not the only one with cryptic knowledge, twink-pire." I batted my eyelashes at him—and smacked him on the ass as I walked past, just for good measure.

He gave an ungainly squeak, and glared after me.

It was a nice ass. Wished I hadn't noticed that.

Fighting with Barnaby was all well and good, but I needed to figure out what was really going on here, with his explanation laid out for us on a silver platter, but helpfully devoid of any concrete evidence or references to back it up.

Beatrice said she'd never heard of such a thing, and if she hadn't, I was sure it didn't exist. But all the same, she was taking him at his word (all that dark vampire knowledge of his), and looking for some way to make a signal to draw them home. It was weird all round—that he'd know something like this (if true) or that she'd listen to him, if he was as full of bullshit as I thought he was.

Did he have some source we'd never heard of? Was he making it up to get a good look at the layout of...the library? So far, I hadn't let him out of my sight, and I wouldn't. Did I think he was up to something? Nah, not really.

He might think he was a big scary vampire, but he just wasn't that intimidating. So what was going on here?

He sidled up to me, frowning. "How do you know my name is Barnaby? I mean, assuming that it is, which I'm not admitting."

I didn't look at him but kept sorting books. I acted calm, but my heart thumped. I wished he wouldn't stand this close. He was too good-looking to stand so close to me, even if he was a vampire.

"You've been keeping secrets," I told him.

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